December 1998

wtlv
December 27, 1998
Sunday again. I am in Las Vegas with Jim for a few days. I know it doesn't make sense. In fact, I went to Karen's house today to get her to do a reading for me just to see what he is thinking regarding this trip. She tells me that the cards show this is all about him - he is testing something out in himself. Something about our relationship. As for me, I think nothing can be done. He doesn't love me enough to love me fat - and so, for now, I am unprepared for this strange turn of events. I've dropped enough of my feelings on him in the past 5 years, if there is going to be anything here, he has to make the move. And, I already said, I am far too fat for him to make a move on. He looks great - probably 160-165, lean, tight, smooth. If he can do it at 34, I can do it at 31. So, we are in Vegas. I am writing from the hotel room at 4 am - he is still down in the casino playing blackjack. I was up $185 from a $100 bet and in 4 minutes lost it all. So here I am, down my first $100. Two days left to get it back. Read More...
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